Hey.
So I’m going to have to take a short break from this blog because of imminent personal factors (AKA job searching 24/7). As I said before, I love doing it, but it takes a TON of my time. So much so that I can’t even play videogames for 6 hours a day. You are keeping me from that. How does that make you feel?
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Site Updates | Tagged: Site updates, Summer 2013 | 
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Posted by Chris Rio
Yesterday was Mother’s Day. Here are the three stupidest things mine has ever said to me.
I’m not fat. I never was and have no plans to be in the future. But I really, really like food. I have taken some steps to be healthier recently. Thankfully, they’ve since fixed the elevator.
Leave a Comment » | Holidays | Tagged: batman, clean plate club, generation me, Mom, mother's, not father's | Permalink
Posted by Chris Rio
For Part One, click here.
When we last left off, I said I was going to explain the main reason why no meaningful gun legislation will be passed anytime soon:
During all the chaos in the last few weeks, it was easy to miss the fact that Congress failed to pass what was arguably the weakest gun control bill in history, which would have essentially clarified the fact that every gun sale, public or private, should include a background check as part of the process. Most of the votes fell within traditional party lines, which isn’t really surprising, just annoying. And because of pointless Senate rules, it got a majority of the votes but failed to pass. Which isn’t really annoying, just infuriating.
Leave a Comment » | Politics | Tagged: 2nd amendment, bazookas, democrats, George h.w., guns, NRA, Wayne | Permalink
Posted by Chris Rio
Update: I finished writing this article and published it at 9 AM on the 15th. Obviously, I had no idea about the horrible events that would unfold today. This has hit extremely close to my home, and I am still severely shaken. Although this writing is not directly related to the tragedy, I understand the unfortunate coincidence that this is in part about senseless violence. I am choosing not to take it down because I still think it’s important, but I have edited out a joke that I felt was inappropriate given the circumstances. Remember, in times of high emotion, it is more important than ever to keep a level head.
Please consider donating to The One Fund here to help the victims of this tragedy.
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Back in December, I wrote a piece right after the Sandy Hook shootings that was partly about guns, and I stand by everything I said. However, I declined to emphasize a silver lining that occurs due to the media’s non-stop coverage of such tragedies – it gets people to at least talk about gun control.
I would like to consider this a pseudo-sequel to that last article, as a non-emotional response to the events that occurred last year, and also as a timely commentary on the current events surrounding gun control. I’m going to try and be as objective as possible, so here it goes: here are 6 things you will almost never see reported in the media about guns.
2 Comments | Politics | Tagged: chuck norris, four loko, guns, mother jones, Sandy Hook | Permalink
Posted by Chris Rio
The Star Wars Prequels are hands-down the most underrated series of movies ever developed. I saw Episode I when I was 10 years old, and it changed my life. The drama. The tension. The light sabers. The Jar Jar.
Now, this may be a rather unpopular opinion, and I invite people to politely disagree. But I believe I have indisputable proof that these movies were simply better than the originals in almost every aspect. In this list, I will explain how all the characters that were introduced and then killed off in Episode I actually have full character arcs that rival The Godfather. I will analyze the dialog, and breakdown exactly why George Lucas’s writing chops shone brighter than ever, especially during Episode II’s pivotal scenes. I will argue why Hayden Christensen and that kid with the bowl cut couldn’t have been more perfect for their roles as Anakin, and why Yoda became way more interesting as an entirely computer generated whatever he is. Also, as an avid C-SPAN watcher, I thoroughly enjoyed the parts about the Galactic Senate, and if anything the movies needed some extra explanation as to how the trade embargoes affected the constituents of the voting majority.
But let’s start with the basics. What really made these movies so great?
1 Comment | Holidays | Tagged: childhood ruining, crap, horrible, Jar Jar, movies, plotless, pointless, star wars | Permalink
Posted by Chris Rio
Once upon a time I went to Europe with some friends. Although the trip was filled with adventures, most of them are your typical “Wow, there is no way that would be legal in America” college kid stuff. Despite that, I honestly believe that I can claim that I got to do something that most Americans will never get the chance to do ever in their lives.
Leave a Comment » | Story Time | Tagged: goulash, Hungary, hungry, Paintball, soviet | Permalink
Posted by Chris Rio
At some point in my life, I realized pop music lyrics make no damn sense. Mostly because it’s more about the feel of the music and less about the poetry, so songwriters can get away with the most ridiculous assaults on the English language. In Breakdown, I overanalyze the shit of these lyrics and completely miss the point in the process.
This Week’s Breakdown:
“As Long As You Love Me” by the Biebs.
Leave a Comment » | Breakdown | Tagged: BieberFieber, Biebs, Hova, JB | Permalink
Posted by Chris Rio
